Impatient to find someone and get your groove on? Then get a move on!
I know from experience that the most active members are the most attractive members! They’re the ones who get the most attention because they’re willing to expend a little effort and give fate a helping hand!
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In many emails I’ve recently received, I’ve noticed an interesting trend. I get lots of emails from TRUE members who are discouraged, because even after they’ve taken my advice and made their profiles the absolute best they can, they still don’t get the response they’d like.
Nine times out of 10 when I ask them about their searching, winking, emailing and chatting habits, they tell me they wink at maybe five new members per week, send out an email or two, and that they’ve never checked out our chat rooms!
Aha! Suddenly it all becomes clear.
Getting active on the site is the best way of increasing your chances of finding love.
Now for the practical advice. Here are the top three ways to get moving on TRUE:
If at first you don’t succeed, search and search again
Whether your last date was a dud and you’re starting over, or you’re trying online dating for the first time, searching is the first ingredient in my recipe for TRUE love. Many members aren’t aware that there are several different ways to search on the site, and that by changing your approach here and there, you might just stumble onto the potential partner of your dreams.
Check out my column on how to find and be found for more detailed info, but here are a couple of quick search options that are always at your fingertips:
Photo-only Quick Search
Finds only profiles with photos in the area and age range you choose. (Most people only search profiles with photos – if you don’t have one posted yet, click here to upload a pic now!)
Who’s Online
Gives a list of all the members who are on TRUE right now. This is a great way to find someone to chat with!
TRUE also offers advanced searching, keyword searching and screen name searching, so you’ve got lots of ways to track down your soul mate. (Which means your soul mate has lots of ways to track you down, too!)
You’ll get together with a wink and a smile
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For more tips on making TRUE work for you, visit the TRUE Coaching Center™.
Welcome to Ask Fite – a column dedicated to answering your questions about TRUE, profiles, chat rooms, winks and email. I’m Fite. I’m a real person, and it’s my job to help you improve your profile.
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What’s so great about sending out lots of winks? That’s simple – it’s just a matter of probability. The more winks you send out, the more members you make contact with. And the more members you make contact with, the higher your chances of finding your most compatible soul mate!
Today, why not wink at 15 TRUE cuties you haven’t met yet? (You’ll actually be doing 5 times more than the average TRUE user, so this will put you way ahead of the competition!) It’s an easy, simple way to start getting more active on the site, and once you see results from amping up your winking activity, you’ll be anxious to get emailing and chatting as well!
Here’s something I hear quite often from women (and some men, too) on TRUE: Why should I email and wink at anyone? My profile is interesting, my pictures are hot, so they should just come to me, right?
Not so fast, ladies! This is the 21st century, isn’t it? Why even subscribe to TRUE if you’re not going to maximize all the chances we offer to help you find your soul mate? You’re already here, which shows that you know what you want and won’t settle for less.
Use that confidence, girl! Don’t be afraid to wink and say, “Hey, I’d love to chat with you!” Just like men are in the traditional dating world, they tend to be the initiators online as well. If you can manage to step outside your comfort zone and take a little risk, he’s bound to take it as a huge compliment! I challenge you to wink at that guy you’ve had your eye on, or better yet…
Go the extra mile with an email
This is a rather intimidating prospect for many people just starting out in the world of dating online, but it almost always yields the best results! Some general guidelines for writing that first email that says, “Let’s talk!”:
Don’t ignore the subject line!
Use it like a newspaper headline: “Extra! Extra! Fascinating guy says hello to beautiful Denver diva in a groundbreaking TRUE email!” Get creative, be positive, ham it up! Highlight your unique personality and your love interest might just open up your email before anything else in their inbox.
No pick-up lines, please!
This should go without saying, no matter how original, charming or funny you think yours is. It almost always makes an iffy first impression. Respectful flirtation: great. Smarmy pick-up lines: gross.
No form letters!
Don’t send a first email that looks like a cookie-cutter “Hi there!” you probably send to everyone who catches your eye. That’s what winks are for. If you’re emailing someone, you need to show that person that you looked a little bit closer at their individual profile. Ask about something specific from their profile that you found interesting, or tell them about an interest you share.
Introduce yourself!
Go a little beyond the information that’s in your “About Me” description, but be careful about getting long-winded or sounding self-absorbed.
Have fun!
But only if your interest’s profile suggests that they’d react well to a little teasing and flirtation. And make sure to keep things light and friendly, no matter what. My rule of thumb about flirting in the first email: When in doubt, leave it out! (Or email me and ask me what I think!)
Want me to take a look at your profile and tell you what I think? I’m here for you, so email me!
Want me to use your profile in an upcoming column? Email me! (But don’t worry – unless you give me permission to use your profile for a column (with your name and identifying details changed if you like), everything we discuss will remain confidential.
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